I would first like to welcome you to my blog and show my appreciation to every reader for taking a leap of faith with me in this journey of sobriety and more importantly the journey of life!
Black roast, no milk or cream please! You could say that I am a simple man… complicated, yet simple. The conversations I used to have over a beer or 12, a half a bottle of whisky, a couple shots of cognac, or really anything with that savory substance of alcohol, will now be replaced with a good ole cup of Joe, a caramel macchiato, cold press, a baby cup of espresso, or shit (excuse my French) … maybe even some green tea. Tea will be spilled anyways, so when in Rome…
When I mention the spilling of tea, I am not talking about gossip but more less the journey through the thoughts that continuously race to the finish line in my mind. You can look forward to some great content revolved around some real-life topics that can bring forth a multitude of emotions and more importantly… conversation starters; Fatherhood without positive role models in your life, becoming a man when you are raised by a woman, learning to love when it was never received nor accepted, marriage, divorce, relationships, goals and aspirations, and that can be the negatives and positives of any of those topics and much more!
I think back to early memories of my parent’s relationship and I try to pick apart the limited snippets of where love resided within my household. It always seems like there was always tension and hatred fuming in the air with a haunting presence. I’ve watched them both betray each other time after time not realizing this would soon affect the type of man I would become. I believe a lot of men (especially black men) are not equipped with the tools to know how to treat a woman when they haven’t seen it first-hand. A lot of us learn as we grow and definitely by lessons learned from the many mistakes we make on these non-directed paths. So, you look at not having a positive male role model… this affects your ability to be a partner, a lover, a father, and sometimes even a friend. Then you look at the other side of it, getting your first impression of a woman, many times from a broken woman. For me that was my mother and it affects the way I have sometimes lacked respect towards women instead of loving delicately. We are products of our environment but that doesn’t mean we can’t alter ourselves as we grow and become conscious of who we have become. I look in the mirror and sometimes I see my father but I strive to be a better him… I look at my actions and often I feel my mother but I strive to become a better her, because at the end of the day we are human and no one is perfect.
Tip the barista and I will clear the table!
Until next time… ciao!